He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
