I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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