I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize