Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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