He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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