I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Randomize
