Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize