I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize
