I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize
