Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
