I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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