Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
