What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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