It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
i black out too much to be "responsible"
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
