Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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