She said her name was "party"
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
