so let's talk penis.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
