At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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