And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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