I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize
