I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
