I'm jealous of your bromance
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Randomize
