PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
