I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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