I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
