I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
