i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
