I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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