after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Operation Purity has been aborted
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
