I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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