Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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