Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize