Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize