The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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