I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I think your dad took our porno
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
