She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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