we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
