Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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