I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
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