You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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