matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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