I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
