Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
