Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
