There is no way he is gay with that hair.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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