Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
You ate ashes out of my bong
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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