he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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