That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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