Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize