your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
