margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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