are you still at the devil's house?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
